SheepOverboard’s editors unanimously proclaim Australia [phon: oztrillia;oztraylya; toff: orstrellia] a leading combatant in the unseemly international brawl craving this coveted slur: 51st aspirant of that irascible empire, the United States of Amnesia.
Perennially mistaken by Yanks for Austria, this is no minor Nazi bivouac of the old world, but a vibrant vigorous new Fascist exemplification, consuming a southern hemisphere continent equalling the U.S. in size, and a culture rivalling that failed state in calamity.
Australians, like Americans and chooks, are “a sublime blend of naked ambition and utter stupidity [hat tip].”
Australia’s psyche amounts to little more than a parochial football club. It cries too readily "a fair go," exclaims too loudly "the lucky country."
Brandishing relic icons that seeded its identity, like a drug-wasted youth hocking parent’s war medals, this once-great nation descends from giant of social, industrial, and scientific innovation to greedy consuming clown in the bereft circus despoiling this planet.
We, who spurned the greatest of opportunities.