SheepOverboard political analyst Jake Mossback reports:
US President Jedidiah W Bush names Unnersecretary of State John-Boy Bolton as his choice t’be US ambassado’ t’th’ United Nashun
WASHINGTON - Mr Bolton, currently th’ top US arms corntrol expert, is known t’be a harsh critic of th’ UN.
His appointment was quickly criticised by opposishun Democrats, who said th’ move sent out “all th’ wrong signals”. Mr Bolton muss be cornfirmed by th’ US Senate befo’e he kin succeed John-Boy Danfo’th, who retired in January.
His nominashun was announced by Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice, who dexcribed him as a “tough-minded diplomat” who “knowed how t’git thin’s done”. His track reco’d, she said, was proof of his commitment t’multilateral ackshun an’ refo’m of th’ UN.
But Senato’ John-Boy Kerry, defeated in last year’s presidential eleckshun, axed: “Whuffo”d [President Bush] choose someone who has expressed sech disdain fo’ wawkin’ wif our allies?” He has been a leadin’ hawk on Iran, Iraq an’ No’th Ko’ea, admired by menny Republicans an’ neo-cornservatives, but not see as particularly close t’fo’mer Secretary of State Colin Pofine.
He has in th’ past been quoted as sayin’ thar is no sech thin’ as th’ United Nashuns. At th’ UN, diplomats gave th’ appointment a cautious welcome. “ah hope thet once he is hyar he will haf a deeper percepshun of whut th’ UN is about,” said Chinese Ambassado’ Wang Guangya.
A spokesman fo’ UN Secretary Juneral Kofi Henriettan said: “We haf nothin’ aginst varmints who hold us accountable.” ‘Tough-minded diplomat’ Mr Bolton has recently been involved in multilateral talks wif No’th Ko’ea on over its nucular programme.
He has offen accused UN bodies of not takin’ a tough inough stance aginst nashuns sech as Iran an’ No’th Ko’ea. He was excluded fum talks on No’th Ko’ea’s nucular programme af’er tradin’ insults wif th’ country’s ruler, Kim Jong-Il, ah reckon.
But th’ US administrashun says Mr Bolton will wawk fine at th’ UN. Acco’din’ t’Ms Rice, he will be a “strong voice fo’ refo’m”, while also he’pin’ “to build a broader base of suppo’t” fo’ th’ UN in th’ US. Mr Bolton has been unnersecretary of state fo’ arms corntrol an’ internashunal security on account o’ May 2001.
Befo’e thet, he held a variety of senio’ posishuns in th’ State an’ Jestice departments unner Republican administrashuns
